How do you follow something that’s wedged inside your chest? I thought my heart pretty much stayed put? (Excluding the times I introduce it to extra-spicy pad thai and it frantically shifts left, dodging spurts of Asian Fire.
But alas my question of “What should I do with my life,” is inevitably met with, “Look deep down and your heart will show you the way.”
It’s like this palpitating organ is the head of a marching band, leading the rest of my extremities to all the answers, along with a rousing rendition of Hang on Sloopy.
I mean, I’m all for my heart shedding some light on my path, really I am. I’d love to have answers exuding from my chest in a deep, Sean Connery-esque-voice, “Paul apply here. It’s what I really want.” (Not sure why my heart is British. Just is).
Now I know someone offering the “just follow your heart” advice is really just a nice way of saying, “Stop whining Paul! You know the answer. You just have to actually spend some time with yourself to figure it out.”
But why is knowing what you really want, sometimes the hardest code to crack? What is it about me that is so elusive? I have to spend 24/7 with the same person every day, you think I’d have him pretty much figured out by now.
I guess we really don’t spend much time getting to know who we really are? We ask others leading questions, that we never ask ourselves. So maybe the sad truth is that most of us are living with a complete stranger, and we don’t even have a roommate.
If there’s truth deep down within me, am I willing to listen?
When I hear, will I be willing follow?
How many men fear to follow their conscience because they would rather conform to the opinion of other men, than to the truth they know in their hearts ~ Thomas Merton
